Hey, paesanos! It's The Super Madman Super Offer!
I'm the Peace-Loving Madman, and writing is my game, I'm not like the others who get all the fame. If your idea is in trouble, you can call me on the double, I’ll help you out, you'll be hooked on the Madman! Uh! You'll be hooked on the Madman. Gimme gimme, gimme gimme! You're in for a treat, so hang on to your seat. Get ready for adventures and remarkable feats.
1) Starting fee of the first ten thousand words up front + two (2) euro per thousand words above that, and I will dedicate my free time to your story.
Time: a week, give or take.
2) Starting fee of the first ten thousand words up front + one (1) euro per thousand words above that, and I will lob your story in with all my other projects.
Time: a month, give or take.
- Notes: I won’t actually be able to tell you from the start how long a story will be. Depends on my interest in it and the meat on its bones (no offence to veggies). A normal chapter for me is eight or ten thousand words. A two-parter is twenty to twenty-three. Time is relative and there are many factors that could tip it either way.
WHAT I DO
Everything except furry. Bonus to you if you can suggest something I would refuse (other than furry).
My strong suit is science fiction and fantasy, but I do dabble.
I also do fanfiction, if it’s a franchise I’m familiar with. Check with me to make sure.
WHY ME, YOU MIGHT BE ASKING?
Am I really worthy of the price? Well, check my gallery and read some of my other stuff to check for yourself.
Oh right, credentials. I’ve been writing for seven years but my mind has been concocting since I was a boy. English is my second language but you’ll hardly notice it, I’d wager. I can write your story in English and Danish, and I can pepper it with broken German. Everything else is google translate unless otherwise provided; also a strange inability to use semicolons properly. (Self-proclaimed)
A note here on devART will be fine. Should you not have a devART, then I also have a tumblr: www.tumblr.com/blog/peacelovin…. Should you not have that either, then I hope you can at least send a mail: jens5461 at Hotmail dot com (make it into a real address yourself. I’m a little paranoid about spambots.)
If you have any questions after reading this, comment. If I deem it valuable I’ll put it here. But why would you ask something stupid anyway!
Rules are the same as above except we'll be able to tell more precisely how much it'll cost. So, just send me a link to the fic and I’ll throw the translation up on google docs eventually. If you so wish, I can also post it on deviantART, FIMFiction or Pony Fiction Archive. Now keep in mind that I will be editing someone else’s story, so I need to personally ask for consent to a) translate it and b) publish it.
Other than that, there’s the normal way and the Max Power way, which is just like the normal way except I’ll be translating EVERYTHING. (Rainbow Dash = Regnbue Spurt). Be forthcoming with other requests from the get-go.
I’ve been doing this kind of thing for over ten years as a hobby, and if that’s not enough, check out my translation of the first chapter of Three Kingdoms (hasn’t been proofread yet, so may contain some errors. The numbers are annotations to be added later.) docs.google.com/document/d/1-I…
I accept paypal for that secure transaction feel.